She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize