talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
