haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
