her facebook's as public as her vagina
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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