can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
