I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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