i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
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