Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Let's paint friendship bongs
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
