Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Every concussion has its silver lining
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
