i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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