we're blogging at a bar
Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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