So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
party gras won. party gras always wins.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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