Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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