I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Couch. On fire.
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