yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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