A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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