Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize
