So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
