ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
