Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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