My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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