We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
