who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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