I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
