how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize