i just wanna soil my oats bro
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
