I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
