there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
false alarm, still single
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