I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize