She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Randomize
