last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
