i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
They are going to name an STD after you.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
