ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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