Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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