haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i will never coherently bang her
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
