she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Randomize
