I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
