I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Everything about him screamed your future.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
When did angry sex become our thing?
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
