my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
