Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
