So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
