What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Randomize
