I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
