after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize