I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
