Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
