And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i came on her dog
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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