So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I need a burrito and a hug.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
