Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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