Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
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